“You know, my old man wasn't around when I was born. Why should I be?”
Esai Morales - Bob Morales

“I bet your father spent the first year of your life throwing rocks at the stork.”
Groucho Marx - J. Cheever Loophole

“I don't have a dad. I never did. I sprang full-blown from my mother's imagination.”
Jonah Blechman - Arthur Gayle

“Why, does it come off?”

Matthew Perry - Alex Whitman

“I knew each child I helped bring into the world was a gift, not from me, but from God.”

Christine Lahti - Gisella Perl