- Drama Teacher: What are you going to do?
- Sheila: I'm doing "The Towering Inferno".
- Drama Teacher: What?
- Sheila: You know, the movie.

“To me you were! Whoever you were in those movies, those silly goddamn heroes meant a lot to me! What does it matter if it was an illusion? It worked! So don't tell me this is you life-size. I can't use you life-size. I need Alan Swanns as big as I can get them!”

Mark Linn-Baker - Benjy Stone

“It'll be just like in the movies. Pretending to be somebody else.”
Naomi Watts - Betty

“I like working with directors. And I've saved a lot of their jobs. And they've saved a few of my performances...”
Whoopi Goldberg - Whoopi Goldberg

I'm really glad you rejected me ten years ago when I auditioned for the part of Eddie Solomon, the pedophile clown in "Birthday Boy". If I'd have gotten that part, I might have been typecast.

Danny DeVito - Martin Weir