“- Ellen Griswold: I think I broke my nose.
- Rusty Griswold: I stabbed my brain.
- Audrey Griswold: I just got my period.”

Beverly D'Angelo - Ellen Griswold
Anthony Michael Hall - Rusty Griswold
Dana Barron - Audrey Griswold

“If it bleeds, it leads!”
Kelsey Grammer - Robert Hawkins

“You lost a lot of blood but we found most of it.”
Jay Mohr - Anthony 'Tony' Cortino

“- Mike McDermott: What happened?
- Worm: Nothing, she closed her legs too fast!”

Matt Damon - Mike McDermott
Edward Norton - Worm

“Don't hurt me! I think I may be a bleeder!”
Stuart Pankin - Dudley Laywicker