“- Mona Lisa Vito: I want a wedding in church with bridesmaids and flowers.
- Vinny Gambini: Whoa. How many times did you say that spontaneous is romantic?
- Mona Lisa Vito: Hey, a burp is spontaneous. A burp is not romantic.”
Marisa Tomei - Mona Lisa Vito
Joe Pesci - Vinny Gambini

“If two members of staff have to fall in love and decide to get married, there's nothing one can say. But what I do find a major irritation are those persons who are simply going from post to post looking for romance.”
Philip Anthony Hopkins - James Stevens

“If you believe in romance, and if you believe in marriage, you also have to believe in divorce.”
Alex Borstein

“- Rusty Griswold: Dad, I think he's gonna pork her.
- Clark Griswold: He's not gonna pork her, Russ.
- Rusty Griswold: I think he's gonna.
- Clark Griswold: He may pork her, finish your breakfast.”

Jason Lively - Rusty Griswold
Chevy Chase - Clark Griswold

“- Jenny: I seriously think it's time for you to move on and stop this broken-heart stuff.
- Rick Rambis: All right. So... you wanna hook up?
- Jenny: You're gonna have to try a lot harder than that, Rick.
- Rick Rambis: Soooo... you still wanna hook up?”
A.J. Cook - Jenny
Jason London - Rick Rambis