“- Richie: Clark! You kissed a girl before I did?
- Clark: This is way better than macaroni!”
David Spade - Richie
Jon Heder - Clark

“- John Dixon: I like you a lot.
- Steven Carter: What about Christina?
- John Dixon: No contest, you're a better kisser!
- Steven Carter: Promise?
- John Dixon: Promise.”
Brad Gorton - John Dixon
Ben Silverstone - Steven Carter

“- Joan Winfield: Don't you get lonesome being here all alone?
- Pop Tolliver: No, I like people. Not seeing many of them keeps me liking them.”
Bette Davis - Joan Winfield
Harry Davenport - Pop Tolliver

“- Lance Rogers: Doctor, I'm disappointed in my judgment. I'm beginning to like you.
- Doug Lee: Doctor, I'm just suffering a similar disillusionment. I'm beginning to suspect you're almost human yourself.”
Ralph Bellamy - Lance Rogers
Errol Flynn - Doug Lee

“Scotty, you're boring. I liked you for a while, but now I can't stand looking at you. Even your voice makes me sick.”

Haylie Johnson - Nikki Trainor