“- Mike: Come on, let's go, I'm giving a pop quiz and I can't wait to hear the groans!
- Ian Miller: Wow! You're mean! I give a test on Hamlet but I give fair warning!”
Ian Gomez - Mike
John Corbett - Ian Miller

“A laughing woman is disarmed, you can do what you like.”
Julien Carette - Marceau, le braconnier

“- Joe Fabrini: l ain't danced in a long time.
- Cassie Hartley: Me neither, and l used to love it. lt's the most fun you can have without laughing.”
George Raft - Joe Fabrini
Ann Sheridan - Cassie Hartley

- "Candy" Johnson: We're gonna play a little game called committing suicide.
- Brazos Hearn: What are the rules?
- "Candy" Johnson: One of us shoots himself.
- Brazos Hearn: And the other?
- "Candy" Johnson: Laughs his sides off.
Clark Gable - "Candy" Johnson
Albert Dekker - Brazos Hearn

“There's a lot to be said for making people laugh. Did you know that that's all some people have? It isn't much, but it's better than nothing in this cockeyed caravan.”
Joel McCrea - John L. Sullivan