- Ron Burgundy: What cologne you gonna go with? "London Gentleman", or wait. No, no, no. Hold on. "Blackbeard's Delight".
- Brian Fantana: No, she gets a special cologne... it's called "Sex Panther" by Odeon. It's illegal in nine countries... yep, it's made with bits of real panther, so you know it's good.
Will Ferrell - Ron Burgundy
Paul Rudd - Brian Fantana

“- Chris Thorne: That's where they buried Flipper.
- Fausto Squiriniszu: Flipper is dead?”

Chevy Chase - Chris Thorne
Taylor Negron - Fausto Squiriniszu

“- Tommy: Where are we gonna take the deer?
- Richard: I dunno, the vet?
- Tommy: You take dead animals to the vet?
- Richard: Why not? I'd take you to the vet.
- Tommy: Yeah I'll take you to the... Um...
- Richard: Got that?
- Tommy: Shut up.”

Chris Farley - Tommy
David Spade - Richard

“- Vincent Cadby: Something wrong, Mr. Ventura?
- Ace Ventura: Of course not. This is a lovely room of death.”

Simon Callow - Vincent Cadby
Jim Carrey - Ace Venura

“- Jay: We don't like bugs?
- Kay: Bugs thrive on carnage, Tiger. They consume, infest, destroy, live off the death and destruction of other species.”

Will Smith - Jay
Tommy Lee Jones - Kay