“Collegegirls have three times more sexual partners than a regular girl.”
Gary Wolf - Snake

- Scotty Brennen: See that girl over there in the red? Say "hi" to her and she's yours. She'll have her legs around you so tight you'll be begging for mercy.
- Josh: Well, I'll stay away from her, then.

Jon Lovitz - Scotty Brennen
Tom Hanks - Josh

- "Booger": Big deal! Did you get in her pants?
- Gilbert: She's not that kind of girl, Booger.
- "Booger": Why? Does she have a penis?

Curtis Armstrong - "Booger"
Anthony Edwards - Gilbert

“When a girl tells you how many guys she's slept with, multiply it by three and that's the real number. Didn't you fuckers learn anything in college?”
Seann William Scott - Stifler

“- Danny: Well you know, these girls are only good for one thing.
- Sonny: Yeah, what are you suppose to do with them the rest of the 23 hours and 45 minutes of the day?”
John Travolta - Danny
Michael Tucci - Sonny