“- Trixie Young: I think your dad likes my mom. Usually when a guy does that, I hit him with a car and I knock him down the stairs, I've gotta look out for her. But your dad, he doesn't bug me so much.
- Junior Healy: And you know something? Your mom doesn't bug me so much.”
Ivyann Schwan - Trixie Young
Michael Oliver - Junior Healy

“The fans are like women. When you're hitting, they love you. When you're not, they'd just as soon spit on you as look at you.”

Wesley Snipes - Bobby Rayburn

“- Lewis Scott: Who are you man? Some bitter ex-high school player who never really made it? You sit around, watching sports, criticizing professional athletes 'cause you wish it was you out there.
- Mike O'Hara: You are so far off. It's sad.”
Damon Wayans - Lewis Scott
Daniel Stern - Mike O'Hara

“You got yourself a distraction that needs dealing with.”

Chris Mulkey - Frank

“You bitch! Why didn't you just tell me it was a Rum and Coke?!”

Tom Cruise - Brian Flanagan