“- Prime Minister Soto: President Benson, where's your First Lady?
- Tug Benson: I don't know. I've had lots of women. Lost my flower at the age of 15. I can't keep track.”
Clyde Kusatsu - Prime Minister Soto
Lloyd Bridges - Tug Benson

“Now listen to me and listen to me good! When your wife, on her honeymoon, asks you to cock her, you cock her good, God damn it!”
Jerry Stiller - Doc

“- Dr. Ben Sobel: Why do you have a girlfriend?
- Paul Vitti: I do things with her I can't do with my wife.
- Dr. Ben Sobel: Why can't you do them with your wife?
- Paul Vitti: That's the mouth she kisses my kids goodnight with! What are you, crazy?”
Billy Crystal - Dr. Ben Sobel
Robert De Niro - Paul Vitti

“What is wrong with a man wanting his wife and his wife's best friend to lick his dick at the same time?”
Coati Mundi - Caller #8 - Martin

“- Alley Thug: You're real cool for somebody who's about to take a bullet.
- Joe Hallenbeck: After fucking your wife I'll take two.”
Badja Djola - Alley Thug
Bruce Willis - Joe Hallenbeck