- Atterbury Dodd: Hasn't anyone an answer for stupidity besides "That's the picture business"?
- Studio Employee: I'm sorry Mr. Dodd, but that's the only answer.
Leslie Howard - Atterbury Dodd
Harry Woods - Studio Employee

“I'm not stupid, I know everyone thinks I am, I just don't like answering stupid questions.”
Khleo Thomas - Zero

“Man how the hell can they call Pluto a planet? No motherfucking planet has an elliptical orbit. This shit don't make no sense.”
Jerod Mixon - Shonté Jr.

“- Ron Burgundy: Brian, I'm gonna be honest with you, that smells like pure gasoline.
- Brian Fantana: They've done studies, you know. 60% of the time, it works every time.
- Ron Burgundy: That doesn't make sense.”

Will Ferrell - Ron Burgundy
Paul Rudd - Brian Fantana

“- Christine: Why don't you put your money where your mouth is?
- Hawk: Why don't you lick my hairy crack?
- Christine: Why don't you bend over, you're lookin' right at it!
- Lex: That last remark fell about 30 yards away from makin' any sense whatsoever!”
Natasha Lyonne - Christine
Edward Furlong - Hawk
Giuseppe Andrews - Lex