“- Uncle Jesse Duke: You know why tornadoes and blonds are so much alike?
- Luke Duke: No.
- Uncle Jesse Duke: At first, there's a lot of sucking and blowing, and then you lose your house.”
Willie Nelson - Uncle Jesse Duke
Johnny Knoxville - Luke Duke

“Were we so different? She loved once. She hoped once. I could be her. I might be looking into my own future. Until the real future came falling from the air.”

Shizuko Hoshi - Sayuri Narration

“- Shirlee: Its like you're allergic to cornflakes so you start to buy different stuff like a can of peas but when you open up the can of the peas, inside cornflakes, so you pick a TV dinner and open it up and cornflakes.
- Jack: So what does that mean?
- Shirlee: The girls you go out with... outside all different packages but inside... cornflakes.”
Dolly Parton - Shirlee
James Woods - Jack

“- Paula Mann: Sharon, baby, do you think you should go out with a man? I mean... so soon after your ordeal and all?
- Sharon Winters: So, I was raped. It happended six week ago. What do you expect me to do? Observe a year of mouring?
- Paula Mann: Baby, please I didn't mean to bug you or make you mad.”
Sharon Carr - Paula Mann
Stacey Walker - Sharon Winters

“- Charles Townsend: I hope the Angels aren't being too rough on you.
- Jimmy Bosley: Man, please. I date fat women. What you talkin' 'bout?”
John Forsythe - Charles Townsend
Bernie Mac - Jimmy Bosley