“- Cindy Campbell: Don't you think we should check his wallet first?
- Buffy Gilmore: For what?
- Brenda Meeks: Shit, he might have some money.
- Brenda Meeks: Well, we already committed murder, we might as well rob his ass.”

Anna Faris - Cindy Campbell
Shannon Elizabeth - Buffy Gilmore
Regina Hall - Brenda Meeks

“You're a thief. You may have killed your wife and daughter. OK, I'll give you that. But it was me who knocked off the three girls. What are you doing stealing my murders? What kind of fucking friend do you think you are? I suppose you thought you were doing me a favor.”
Rupert Everett - Francesco Dellamorte

“- Joan Stupid: Oh dear I left the garbage out over night.
- Stanley Stupid: Oh no. Someone's stolen our garbage again.”
Jessica Lundy - Joan Stupid
Tom Arnold - Stanley Stupid

“- Policeman: This postal ploy of yours is the most evil caper of our age, Mr. Sender. How will you ever top yourself?
- Evil Sender: With a crime so unthinkable that no-one has ever dared to attempt to attempt it: to rob an entire nation of its garbage.
- Policeman: The one resource no-one ever thinks to protect!”
Scott Kraft - Policeman
Sir Christopher Lee - Evil Sender

“Nobody steals from me. Nobody.”
Louis Mandylor - Riggi