“- Brian Madison: Billy, could you step in here a moment? I have big news.
- Billy Madison: Eric is pregnant?”
Darren McGavin - Brian Madison
Adam Sandler - Billy Madison

“Gee Roger you sure have been grumpy since ya found out you're gonna be a Grandpa!”
Joe Pesci - Leo Getz

“- Sonny Koufax: I got some interesting news.
- Lenny Koufax: Oh yeah, what?
- Sonny Koufax: I kind of adopted a kid.
- Lenny Koufax: What the hell are you talking about?
- Sonny Koufax: I'm talking about you being a grandfather! Congratulations!”
Adam Sandler - Sonny Koufax
Joseph Bologna - Lenny Koufax

“- Carla Pestalozzi: You didn't mean what you just said, did you?
- Stanley Goodspeed: When?
- Carla Pestalozzi: Just right now, when you were talking about bringing a child into the world, and having it be an act of cruelty.”

Vanessa Marcil - Carla Pestalozzi
Nicolas Cage - Stanley Goodspeed

“I'm having a kid. Your little boy's growing up, I got a girl pregnant, now I gotta go visit her. She lives in Reno, I don't know how I'm gonna get there. Probably have to take mom's car. But, we're gonna live together. We're gonna live in the trailer park. Her name's Shirley, she's real great.”
Shia LaBeouf - Kale