“- Joel Barish: I can't see anything that I don't like about you.
- Clementine Kruczynski: But you will! You know, you will think of things. And I'll get bored with you and feel trapped because that's what happens with me.”
Jim Carrey - Joel Barish
Kate Winslet - Clementine Kruczynski

“Scotty, you're boring. I liked you for a while, but now I can't stand looking at you. Even your voice makes me sick.”

Haylie Johnson - Nikki Trainor

“It's like, even though you're engaged, when you're with me I really feel like you're with me, you know? But the scary thing is I actually kinda like it.”

Kevin Bacon - Sam

“- Maggie Chester: I was kind of seeing someone. An author.
- Andrew: And what happened?
- Maggie Chester: He committed suicide.
- Andrew: Oh, I'm so sorry. I didn't...
- Maggie Chester: It's alright. Honestly. Really. I didn't really like him very much. I liked him even less after he committed suicide.”
Emma Thompson - Maggie Chester
Sir Kenneth Branagh - Andrew

“Listen to me ok, please? I love you David, and I love Sarah, but individually. David, together, I think you're a mess.”
Saul Rubinek - Larry