- Pvt. Jamaal Montgomery: You can't say that. That is a diss. I ain't no ox moron.
- Bill Rago: No, no, no not “ox moron”, schmuck! Oxymoron.

Kadeem Hardison - Pvt. Jamaal Montgomery
Danny DeVito - Bill Rago

“- Cop: Come on, we're headin' downtown.
- Sugar Bear: Where your warrant at?
- Cop: Behind that preposition.
- Sugar Bear: What?
- Cop: Didn't you go to school? You can't end a sentence with a preposition.
- Sugar Bear: Oh. Then, uh, where your warrant at, motherfucker?”
Ralph Price - Cop
Reginald Ballard - Sugar Bear

“- Wang Chi-Yang: What do you know of marriage? What do you know of women?
- Wang Ta: Sir, what did you know of marriage and women when you married my mother?
- Wang Chi-Yang: Nothing. That is why I obeyed my father and married the woman he chose for me.”
Benson Fong - Wang Chi-Yang
James Shigeta - Wang Ta

“I have always been of the opinion that a man who desires to get married should know either everything or nothing.”
Dame Judi Dench - Lady Bracknell

“Don't you want to know? Was Jake my father? Was I fucking my daddy? Yes, I was! I was fucking my daddy! And I married him! I married him, okay? I just wanted to be a kid. And they took that from me. They treated me like meat. A piece of meat. Fuck him! Fuck the whole town, they deserve to die!”
Jennifer Lopez - Grace McKenna