“- Andy: Jesus Christ Katie, you're smothering me. Give me some breathing room, I'm choking here!
- Katie: I just want to spend time with you.
- Andy: My butt itches.
- Katie: Hey, we're soul mates, right?
- Andy: Yeah sure... I mean, whatever, if you want. Hey JJ, save me a waffle!”
Paul Rudd - Andy
Marguerite Moreau - Katie

- Coles: Would you think I was being too forward if I said, "Let's go back to your room".
- Sam: What would you say if I said, "Let's go back to my room, but let's bring Thea".
Mark Ruffalo - Coles
Maya Stange - Sam

“- Miguel Manzano: When do I get to sleep with you again?
- Mariana Garcia Guerrero: We never sleep. We fuck.”
Giancarlo Giannini - Miguel Manzano
Rachel Ticotin - Mariana Garcia Guerrero

“- Rosemary Cross: Do you think we're going to have sex?
- Max Fischer: That's a kinda cheap way to put it.
- Rosemary Cross: Not if you've ever fucked before, it isn't.”
Olivia Williams - Rosemary Cross
Jason Schwartzman - Max Fischer

“- Ryan Harrison: Put your hand in my pocket.
- Cass Lake: All right... What am I looking for?
- Ryan Harrison: Nothing. I just missed you, baby. We're going to party like it's 1995.”
Leslie William Nielsen - Ryan Harrison
Melinda McGraw - Cass Lake