“How come when I wanted to ask Eunice out everyone made fun of me, but then Sebastian likes her and suddenly she's cool? Screw you guys. I hate high school.”
Brandon Jay McLaren - Toby

“- Alison Gordon: How can you go through life pretending that you're happy?
- Dr. Lawrence Gordon: I am happy.
- Alison Gordon: That is complete bullshit, I'd rather you break down and tell me that you hated me. At least there would be some passion in it.”
Monica Potter - Alison Gordon
Cary Elwes - Dr. Lawrence Gordon

“For a hero, you're quite a hypocrite!”
Dylan Moran - David

“My $2,000 watch is a fake, and so am I.”
Colin Farrell - Stu Shepard

“It's a stinking hypocritical world isn't it Brent where rapists become pillars of the community, with stinking hypocritical people in it who wouldn't miss their own befouled lives much so... so... so what better way than to take away the only innocence they have left... their precious virginal children.”
Jay Mohr - Leonard Marliston