“- Dale Putley: Jack, look at this.
- Jack Lawrence: It's money. I remember it from when I was single.”
Robin Williams - Dale Putley
Billy Crystal - Jack Lawrence

“- Biderman: You can use these checks. They're temporary.
- Carl Quigley: Thank you, Edward.
- Biderman: Like our relationship.”
Michael Lerner - Biderman
Miguel Ferrer - Quigley

“What if I said I'd be your girlfriend the next couple of days? No charge.”

Rebecca De Mornay - Lana

“I loved, helped, and supported in every way possible a businessman who committed the terrible crime of being financially imaginative with a pension fund.”
Tracey Ullman - Beth Hobbs

“If you can't afford dog food, don't get a dog.”

Charlie Sheen - Charlie Harper