“- Ray: Hey, did you teach your students how to make things like this?
- Mr. Mehlor: Have you been in a high school recently? My students taught ME how to make stuff like this.”
Ricky Harris - Ray
Dann Florek - Mr. Mehlor

“No! Not another one! How many kids are they gonna make me teach?”

James Tolkan - Mr. Thorn

“- Micky Rosa: Look, I've been teaching more than 14 years, I've never had a student as impressive as you. Your brain is like a goddamn Pentium chip. You're gonna do great. You know how I know that? 'Cause you remind me of myself 25 years ago. You in?
- Ben Campbell: Yeah. Yeah, I'm in.”

Kevin Spacey - Micky Rosa
Jim Sturgess - Ben Campbell

“Of the over 3.7 million high school graduates this year, less than 2% can tell you what a fax machine is, name a Caucasian president, or know who Derek Zoolander was!”
Matt Lauer - Himself

“- Dirk Moran: I ought to teach you a lesson.
- Porter Ricks: I'd like that. I have a thirst for knowledge; teach me.”
Jonathan Banks - Dirk Moran
Paul Hogan - Porter Ricks