“Maybe there won't be marriage, maybe there won't be sex, but by God there'll be dancing!”
Rupert Everett - George Downes

“- Violet Sanford: Cammie, I think I just fell in love with you.
- Cammie: Oh Violet, I'm not a lesbian. I played in the minors but never went pro.
- Violet Sanford: That's not what I meant.”
Piper Perabo - Violet Sanford
Izabella Miko - Cammie

“Nootzie! Hey, remember that time Chuck and I ran back into that textile plant and dragged your limp body out? Even though Chuck's leg was broken like in three different places. Man, that was pretty freaking gay of Chuck, huh?”
Kevin James - Larrie Valentine

“- Jerky Boy: Mr. Valentine, you said you're a fireman.
- Larry Valentine: Yes, that is correct.
- Jerky Boy: Do you have two jobs? Because my dad said that you're also a butt pirate.”
Connor Wiles - Jerky Boy
Kevin James - Larrie Valentine

“You can't come by here, because I'm pretending to be gay. In L.A., a straight male hairdresser is an unemployed male hairdresser.”

Royale Watkins - Telly