“I'm 50 years old. I'm a partner in a big law firm. You know I'm very successful, and I still haven't resolved my relationship with my mother.”

Woody Allen - Sheldon

“- Tallahassee: My mama always told me someday I'd be good at something. Who'd a guessed that something'd be zombie-killing?
- Columbus: Probably nobody.”
Woody Harrelson - Tallahassee
Jesse Eisenberg - Columbus

“My son is alive? Who the fuck did I kill?”
Shelley Winters - Mrs. Motel (The Mother)

“- Dr. Animal Cannibal Pizza: The killer's name is Antonio and he hates his mother.
- Jo Dee Fostar: Why?
- Dr. Animal Cannibal Pizza: Maybe 'cause she's a pain in the ass! Did you ever think about that?”
Dom DeLuise - Dr. Animal Cannibal Pizza
Billy Zane - Jo Dee Fostar

“- Debbie Thompson: Rick, you promise you won't fool around at your bachelor party?
- Rick Gassko: I swear on my mother's grave.
- Debbie Thompson: Your mother's still alive.
- Rick Gassko: Well, if I go back on my word, I'll kill her.”
Tawny Kitaen - Debbie Thompson
Tom Hanks - Rick Gassko