“- Jordan Cochran: Are you going to take me home to meet your parents?
- Mitch Taylor: No.
- Jordan Cochran: Why? Are you ashamed of me?
- Mitch Taylor: No, them.”
Michelle Meyrink - Jordan Cochran
Gabriel Jarret - Mitch Taylor

“When they get older and you can't give them as much as other children, they're ashamed of you. And when you give them everything and put them through college, they're ashamed of you.”

Maurice Moscovitch - Max Rubens

“The trouble with kids is they always figure they're smarter than their parents.”
William Demarest - Constable Edmund Kockenlocker

“- Michael Cromwell: You sound like an idiot.
- Richard Kempster: I'm a parent! Therefore, I'm an idiot! I have spent every day for the last 12 years worrying about my kids. About their safety, about their happiness, about their crooked teeth.”

Tim Allen - Michael Cromwell
Martin Hayter Short - Richard Kempster

“We don't just mediate between warring partners. We also check up the child itself psychologically. How does the child deal with the conflicts? Our advice is always binding. Don't take this the wrong way, but you left them. They didn't leave you. You left for another woman. For now, we see no reason to give you custody.”

Nelly Frijda - Dr. Ellis K.P.R.