“- Michael Zane: I've got good news and bad news.
- Jesse Waingrow: What's the good news?
- Michael Zane: Your mom's in the trunk.
- Jesse Waingrow: What's the bad news?
- Michael Zane: She's still alive.”
Kurt Russell - Michael Zane
David Kaye - Jesse Waingrow

“I married Bob, for you! I had sex with Bob four times for you! So how can you call me a bad mother?”

Catherine O'Hara - Cindy Beugler

“Mothers don't lose daughters. Don't you remember? They gain sons.”
Teresa Wright - Charlie Newton

“Psychologically, I married my mother.”
Martin Harvey Friedberg - Mort

“The longer I'm married to you the more you sound like my mother.”

Michael Murphy - Martin