“Last time I smoked that stuff, they found me on top of the Sears Tower trying to build a nest.”

Robin Williams - Jack Moniker

“That's what keeps a relationship going through the years. Like heroin, I mean heroin's got a great fucking personality.”
Jonny Lee Miller - Sick Boy

“Stay away from drugs, gangs, and cyberporn on the Internet and you can be President of the United States some day.”
Dan Aykroyd - Elwood Blues

“- Malcolm: Phoebe - how would you like to supervise our Sidney for a month or two?
- Phoebe: No way.
- Malcolm: Go on; you'd be a good influence on the boy. Why not?
- Phoebe: Infectious hepatitis, loony girlfriend, drugs?
- Malcolm: Boys will be boys.”
David Hayman - Malcolm
Debby Bishop - Phoebe

“- Fein: Back in the 60's, some hippies came here and turned the place into a commune. You know, sex, and drugs, and debauchery.
- Dennis Van Welker: Knew I'd been here before.
- Gaby: Eww! You did that stuff here?
- Dennis Van Welker: No. Not here.”
Burgess Meredith - Fein
Chris Lloyd - Dennis Van Welker
Melody Kay - Gaby Nowicki