“- Margaret Wade: You know why men are so lousy when it comes to taking care of babies?
- Dennis Mitchell: They have better things to do.
- Margaret Wade: Like what? Play golf and drink beer?
- Dennis Mitchell: No, like hunting, having wars, driving cars, shaving, cleaning fish.”
Amy Sakasitz - Margaret Wade
Mason Gamble - Dennis Mitchell

“- Norby: Did a baby get off this bus? A little guy about two feet tall. It's an emergency!
- Bus Driver: I didn't have nobody today with a baby.
- Norby: He was by himself!”
Joe Pantoliano - Norby
Dan Frick - Bus Driver

“A baby's got to do what a baby's got to do!”
Christine Cavanaugh - Chuckie Finster

“- Lil DeVille: Um, Bobfather, we found this in our crib.
- Angelica: Well that's what you get for wiping your boogers on Cynthia.
- Phil DeVille: So that's where I left them.”

Kath Soucie - Lil DeVille
Cheryl Chase - Angelica
Kath Soucie - Phil DeVille

“I want to do something with him that's his first time. I’m gonna look in his face when he tries ice cream. Every time he has ice cream for the rest of his life, he's gonna see my fucking face.”
Ryan Gosling - Luke