“- Sandra Gangel: What happened? School burned down, did it?
- Jamie Gangel: Yeah.
- Sandra Gangel: What was it this time? IRA bomb?
- Jamie Gangel: Fundamentalist Muslim pyromaniacs.
- Sandra Gangel: Oh, funny, that. Looked all right when I walked past it.”
Linda Henry - Sandra Gangel
Glen Berry - Jamie Gangel

“- Mr. Welch: Now I want you to do the bee today, okay?
- Akeelah: So everyone can call me a freak and a brainiac? No I ain't down for no spelling bee.
- Mr. Welch: Well, maybe you'd be down for spending the rest of the semester in detention for all your absences?”
Curtis Armstrong - Mr. Welch
Keke Palmer - Akeelah

“- Francine Fishpaw: Dexter's been expelled from school!
- Cuddles Kovinsky: For what?
- Francine Fishpaw: For truancy!
- Cuddles Kovinsky: It's just those common Baltimore public schools. God, I wish I lived in Connecticut!”
Divine - Francine Fishpaw
Edith Massey - Cuddles Kovinsky

“- Mum: But you've not been to school all week, son.
- Alex: Got to rest, mum. Got to get fit. Otherwise I'm liable to miss a lot more school.”
Sheila Raynor - Mum
Malcom McDowell - Alex (A Clockwork Orange)

“- Freddy Shoop: Hey, I remember you. Where have you been?
- Jerome Watkins: Bathroom.
- Freddy Shoop: For the last six weeks?
- Jerome Watkins: My zipper got stuck.”
Mark Harmon - Freddy Shoop
Duane Davis - Jerome Watkins