“- Montel Gordon: I lost my virginity with a sophomore in high school.
- Ray Castro: That's cool.
- Montel Gordon: Yeah, sweet.
- Ray Castro: Did he treat you good?”
Don Cheadle - Montel Gordon
Luis Guzmán - Ray Castro

“Sex always ends in kids or disease, or like, you know, relationships. That's exactly what I don't want. I want the opposite of all that. Because it's not worth it, not really, is it? When you think about it?”
Christina Ricci - Dede Truitt

“It's really important there be more group social life. Not just all this ferocious pairing off.”
Kate Beckinsale - Charlotte

“Group social life has its place, but at a certain point other biological factors come into play. Our bodies weren't really designed for group social life. A certain amount of pairing off was always part of the original plan.”
Chris Eigeman - Des

“- Principal Evelyn Doyle: What is she doing here?
- Richard Clark: She's my bitch! Well... my significant other. We've been slappin' skins for sometime.”

Louise Fletcher - Principal Evelyn Doyle
Jon Lovitz - Richard Clark