“- Exercise Instructress: Let's begin with posture. A lady always enters a room erect.
- Mrs. Howard Fowler - Sylvia: Most of my friends exit horizontally.”
Ann Morriss - Exercise Instructress
Rosalind Russell - Mrs. Howard Fowler - Sylvia

“- Secretary: Mr. Melborne, what are you doing down there?
- Melborne: Having a private heart attack!”

Allan Cuthbertson - Melborne

“- Sam: I had two heart attacks before I got the bicycle.
- Sandy Bates: And since then?
- Sam: I also had two.”
J.E. Beaucaire - Sam
Woody Allen - Sandy Bates

“- KG: Sex is a crucial component to the Kyle Gass Project. Now drop and give me one cock push-up.
- JB: What's a cock push-up?
- KG: What's a cock push-up? A cock push-up my friend, is when you lay on your stomach, and lift yourself of the ground with nothing but your boner.”
Kyle Gass - KG
Jack Black - JB

“He's what makes us not want to go to work, or exercise, or tell the truth. He's what makes us want to party and have sex with each other all night long.”