“- Lou Peckinpaugh: You mean you married your own father?
- Mrs. Montenegro: It's not like you think. It was a simple wedding, done very tastefully.”
Peter Falk - Lou Peckinpaugh
Madeline Kahn - Mrs. Montenegro

“- Arlene Lorenzo: My life is so tragic!
- Betsy Jobs: Or it could be worse! What if... years from now you get married and find out that your fiancee's dad is your dad too, and you two are brother and sister?
- Arlene Lorenzo: Oh my God!
- Betsy Jobs: Mh. It's called incest, Arlene. And it's against the law.”
Michelle Williams - Arlene Lorenzo
Kirsten Dunst - Betsy Jobs

“I'm not my father, Diane, just like you're not your father. If we were our fathers, what we did last night would only be legal in Arkansas.”
Jay Mohr - Anthony 'Tony' Cortino

“- Oh: I just want to lay with her so badly.
- Zed: I don't see it. I mean she's cute, but I don't think I'd lay with her.
- Oh: She's your sister. I mean, it would be like laying with your mother.
- Zed: Which was a big mistake, I see that now.”

Michael Cera - Oh
Jack Black - Zed

“- Sebastian: You do realize you're my step sister.
- Kathryn: You know what they say about incest.
- Sebastian: Is there any line you won't cross?
- Kathryn: Only one... never in the butt.
- Sebastian: That's a good line.”

Robin Dunne - Sebastian Valmont
Amy Adams - Kathryn Merteuil