“It's not illegal to bribe congressmen. They starve otherwise.”
John Hawkes - Robert Latham

“- Jack Frye: You want me to bribe senators?
- Howard Hughes: I don't want them bribed, Jack. I want it done legally. I want them bought.”
Danny Huston - Jack Frye
Leonardo DiCaprio - Howard Hughes

“Rick, I want Debbie. You dump her and I'll give you cash. Ten thousand dollars, plus a G.E. toaster over, a Litton microwave, a Cuisinart, Michelin tires, brand new, a set of Sears' best metric tools...”
Robert Prescott - Cole Whittier

“- Emmett Fitz-Hume: Oh. Uh, will you hold my wallet for me while I take the test, please? There's a thousand dollars in there... or maybe there isn't. Know what I mean?
- Test Monitor: Are you saying I can take this money if I help you pass the test?
- Emmett Fitz-Hume: What do you think?”
Chevy Chase - Emmett Fitz-Hume
Frank Oz - Test Monitor

“You're offering me a bribe. What you have just done is illegal and in this state, if convicted, you could be fined up to $5,000 or spend six months in a correction facility!”

Jim Carrey - The Cable Guy