- Eric Garrett: Speaking of parties, I'm having one and we'd like to invite you as the official guest of honor.
- Sarah Zoltanne: Why? So you and your little "descendants club" can burn me at the stake and roast marshmallows by the fire?
Christian Campbell - Eric Garrett
Sarah Chalke - Sarah Zoltanne

“- Charles Highway: I notice you don't have a drink.
- Rachel Noyce: Are you giving this party?
- Charles Highway: Certainly not. Parties of this kind are not given, they're received.”
Dexter Fletcher - Charles Highway
Ione Skye - Rachel Noyce

“- Dr. Von Zimmer: Has there been some recent change in living arrangements?
- Barbara Whiteman: We have a houseguest.
- Dr. Von Zimmer: Oh. How long are you staying?
- Dave Whiteman: He's staying as long as he likes. And if the doggy doesn't like it, then the doggy can find other living arrangements.”

Donald F. Muhich - Dr. Von Zimmer
Bette Midler - Barbara Whiteman

“- Cynthia: God they totally threw me. They were such assholes.
- Lisa Reisert: Cynthia, there are no guests who are assholes. Only guests with special needs.”
Jayma Mays - Cynthia
Rachel McAdams - Lisa Reisert

“- Briseis: Am I still your captive?
- Achilles: You're my guest.
- Briseis: Guests can leave whenever they want.”
Rose Byrne - Briseis
Brad Pitt - Achilles