“- Judge: And how is it possible for Mr. Tenenbaum to withdraw these funds without your written authorization?
- Eli Cash: Because I started the corporation when I was a minor. So, my father was the primary signatory on most of my accounts. He also stole bonds out of my safety deposit box when I was fourteen.”
Tom Lacy - Judge
Owen Wilson - Eli Cash

“- Francine Fishpaw: Caught you, didn't I? Right in the act of adultery! I won't stand for this, Elmer. I want a divorce! And a big, fat settlement to go along with it!
- Elmer Fishpaw: You'll never get a penny out of me, you fat hunk of cellulite. I only support the women I love!”

Divine - Francine Fishpaw
David Samson - Elmer Fishpaw

-Walter Burns: You're a newspaperman.
- Hildy Johnson: That's why I'm quitting. I want to go someplace where I can be a woman.
- Walter Burns: You mean "be a traitor".

Cary Grant - Walter Burns
Rosalind Russell - Hildy Johnson

“How could we conquer a country without its traitors?”
Robert Lewis - Capt. Sato

“- Phil: Kid, listen to me. She's...
- Hercules: A dream come true?
- Phil: Not exactly.
- Hercules: More beautiful than Aphrodite?
- Phil: Aside from that.
- Hercules: The most wonderful...
- Phil: She's a fraud! She's been playing you for a sap!”

Danny DeVito - Phil
Tate Donovan - Hercules