“Al? Al Reardon? My father. My moral, upright, coffee sluping, status seeking, putting in overtime, hard day at the office, early rising, early bedding, make your own way in life father, had been screwing Joyce Fickett! That balding man with responsibilities was an extramarital joy-boy! No wonder i was having so much trouble! It was hereditary!”
River Phoenix - Jimmy Reardon

“No more beer for Linda. Doubles for Jack, he's gonna be a father!”
Balthazar Getty - Ray Gauquin

“Natural childbirth means that no drugs will be administered into the female's body during the delivery. The father can have all he wants.”
Bill Cosby - Bill Cosby

“- Bridget Jones: What about the first scan? Would that show when conception took place?
- Dr. Rawlings: No. Ring this number and fix a date. And do bring along the father if you can work out which one he is.”
Renee Zellweger - Bridget Jones
Emma Thompson - Dr Rawlings

“- Wendon: I'm afraid I have some bad news... well maybe its not that bad. The princess is pregnant.
- Jason: Pregnant? How the hell did that happen?
- Wendon: Well you can be sure I had nothing to do with it. She's asking to see you.”
Bruce Vilanch - Wendon
Robert Urich - Jason