“- Michael Zane: I've got good news and bad news.
- Jesse Waingrow: What's the good news?
- Michael Zane: Your mom's in the trunk.
- Jesse Waingrow: What's the bad news?
- Michael Zane: She's still alive.”
Kurt Russell - Michael Zane
David Kaye - Jesse Waingrow

“Into the house! Everyone! Before we're in the evening news!”
Anne Bancroft - Adele

“- MacLeod: You'll have to excuse me. I've gotten some disturbing news.
- Louise: Did somebody die?
- MacLeod: Unfortunately not.”
Christopher Lambert - Duncan McLeod
Virginia Madsen - Louise

“There is some good news, though. The more of you die, the better I eat. I didn't say it was good news for you.”
Will Arnett - Lone Gunslinger Vulture

“- TS Quint: Why do palm reading topless?
- Brodie: It makes the news easier to take. She could tell me I was going to die in ten minutes, just as long as she told me topless.”
Jeremy London - TS Quint
Jason Lee - Brodie