“- Andy: What do you wanna do?
- Keiran: Let's have sex.
- Andy: That's a rare idea. All we do is have sex. I think one day you're gonna kill me if I can't perform.”
Luke Wilson - Andy
Kristin Lehman - Keiran

“We didn't know when the Doc was going to be giving the Sheik his physical but it was our one and only opportunity to take him out. So I didn't have the usual time to butter him up. Which means we needed twice the sex with half the foreplay.”
Robert Redford - Nathan Muir

“I bet right now, you don't know if you want to kill me... or fuck me.”

Jennifer Lopez - Grace McKenna

“The only way he could bang regular chicks is with a Kryptonite condom, but that would kill him.”

Jason Lee - Brodie

“- Joey: Vince, we can't waste a nun.
- Vince LaRocca: What are you two nuts talking about? It's Deloris, in a costume.
- Willy: How do you know she didn't sign up and become one of them when she was there? Things like this happen.
- Vince LaRocca: Because I know this woman. In the biblical sense and she ain't no nun.”
Robert Miranda - Joey
Harvey Keitel - Vince LaRocca
Richard Portnow - Willy