“- Martin Riggs: I'll draw his fire and you run for cover.
- Roger Murtaugh: No. I'll draw his fire and you run for cover.
- Martin Riggs: What are you, out of your mind? You got a wife, kids. I got a lot less to lose than you.”
Mel Gibson - Martin Riggs
Danny Glover - Roger Murtaugh

“- Alan: We can't be friends anymore. When we get together, bad things happen and people get hurt.
- Mr. Chow: Yeah, but that's the point! It's funny!”
Zach Galifianakis - Alan
Ken Jeong - Mr. Chow

“- Curdie: The goblins have a plan and you're a part of it. We can't waste our time with invisible grandmothers.
- Princess Irene: You don't believe me, do you. But I thought we were friends.”

Peter Murray - Curdie
Sally Ann Marsh - Princess Irene

“- Lilly: Are we going to get Eileen out or what?
- Cody Zamora: How?
- Lilly: I don't know, but we got you out when they were gonna lynch you.
- Cody Zamora: Well now, that was lucky.
- Lilly: Look here, I don't let my friends get hung.”
Drew Barrymore - Lilly Laronette
Madeleine Stowe - Cody Zamora

- Albert: Jackson, why did you have to bring me along in the first place?
- "Action" Jackson: You remind me of a old friend.
- Albert: Then why didn't you bring your old friend?
- "Action" Jackson: He's dead.
- Albert: Damn, man why did you have to tell me that?
Stan Foster - Albert
Carl Weathers - "Action" Jackson?