“- Gus: Now, give me a word, any word; and I will show you how the root of that word is greek.
- Costa: Uuuuh, facebook.
- Gus: Huh, the greeks invented facebook. We called it the telephone.”
Michael Constantine - Gus
Michael Sofos - Costa

- Maria Portokalos: Toula, on my wedding night, my mother, she said to me, "Greek women, we may be lambs in the kitchen, but we are tigers in the bedroom."
- Toula Portokalos: Eww. Please let that be the end of your speech.
Lainie Kazan - Maria Portokalos
Nia Vardalos - Toula Portokalos

“When I was growing up, I knew I was different. The other girls were blonde and delicate, and I was a swarthy six-year-old with sideburns.”
Nia Vardalos - Toula Portokalos

“There are two kinds of people - Greeks, and everyone else who wish they were Greek.”
Michael Constantine - Gus Portokalos

I had to go to Greek school, where I learned valuable lessons such as, "If Nick has one goat and Maria has nine, how soon will they marry?"
Nia Vardalos - Toula Portokalos