“- Mallory Knox: What do you want me to do?
- Det. Jack Scagnetti: I want you to kiss me and squeeze my nipple.
- Mallory Knox: You're so specific.”
Juliette Lewis - Mallory Knox
Tom Sizemore - Det. Jack Scagnetti

“- Terry Barkley: Daddy, I need to ask you a favor.
- Lillian Barkley: Well, as long as it's not about skating or disco music.”
Linda Blair - Terry Barkley
Beverly Garland - Lillian Barkley

“That's not gross! Shit, gross is when you go to kiss your grandpa good night and he sticks his tongue down your throat. That's gross!”
Mac Davis - Seth Maxwell

“- Gene Watson: You never once saw your mom and I kiss like that?
- Lynn Watson: No way.
- Gene Watson: Not once? How did you see us kiss? That's it? That 'mwah', that little peck of a kiss? Honey, you missed a whole lot of kissing.”

Johnny Depp - Gene Watson
Courtney Chase - Lynn Watson

“- Mayor Moe Carson: I demand a little respect.
- Lester Cadwalader, Sr.: You're getting it... very little.”
Edgar Kennedy - Mayor Moe Carson
Guy Kibbee - Lester Cadwalader, Sr.