“- Margaret Wade: If you didn't have women, you wouldn't have babies, which means you wouldn't have people.
- Joey: And if you didn't have men, who'd drive the ladies to the hospital?”
Amy Sakasitz - Margaret Wade
Kellen Hathaway - Joey

“- Sharon Winters: Paula, I'm sorry about lashing out at you the other night.
- Paula Mann: Forget it. Sometimes I come on too strong.
- Sharon Winters: No, it's just... I can be such a bitch sometimes.
- Paula Mann: We all are. But that's just part of being female I guess.”
Stacey Walker - Sharon Winters
Sharon Carr - Paula Mann

“- Wayne Carter: I never argue - with a lady.
- Flower Belle Lee: Play it safe, huh?”
Dick Foran - Wayne Carter
Mae West - Flower Belle Lee

“I never argue with women, and certainly not one with a gun!”
Errol Flynn - Kerry Bradford

“Before you pee, you lift the seat; after you pee, you put the seat back down. Females in tribestart war over this. Many deaths.”

Tim Allen - Michael Cromwell