“- Rusty Duritz: When do I learn how to drive?
- Russ Duritz: When you're sixteen.
- Rusty Duritz: When do I get a car?
- Russ Duritz: When you're eighteen.
- Rusty Duritz: When do I get a hickey?
- Russ Duritz: When you're seventeen.
- Rusty Duritz: When do I find out what a hickey is?
- Russ Duritz: Not tonight.”
Spencer Breslin - Rusty Duritz
Bruce Willis - Russ Duritz

“- Becca: We need more learning about things!
- Charlie Hinton: More learning about things?
- Becca: Yes. We're at a very critical age. You have to feed our minds!”
Hailey Noelle Johnson - Becca
Eddie Murphy - Charlie Hinton

“Our children are more capable of retaining and absorbing information than we are and yet we insist on treating them like adorable little morons.”
Rick Moranis - Nathan

“Not many people know what their life's worth is. I do. Seventy grand. That's what they took from me. And that's what I was going to get back.”
Mel Gibson - Porter

“Great money does not a great human make.”
John Carroll Lynch - Artist