“- Lazlo: I will do whatever is best for the ballet!
- Roland T. Flakfizer: Well, there's no reason to commit suicide.”
John Savident - Edmund Lazlo
John Turturro - Roland T. Flakfizer

“- Colonel Saito: Do you know what will happen to me if the bridge is not built on time?
- Colonel Nicholson: I haven't the foggiest.
- Colonel Saito: I'll have to kill myself. What would you do if you were me?
- Colonel Nicholson: I suppose if I were you... I'd have to kill myself.”
Alec Guinness - Colonel Nicholson
Sessue Hayakawa - Colonel Saito

“- Robert Crosbie: I'll do whatever you think is right.
- Howard Joyce: I don't think it's right, but I think it's expedient.”
Herbert Marshall - Robert Crosbie
James Stephenson - Howard Joyce

“- Wolf J. Flywheel: There are many bonds that will hold us together through eternity.
- Martha Phelps: Really, Wolf? What are they?
- Wolf J. Flywheel: Your government bonds, your savings bonds, your liberty bonds.”

Groucho Marx - Wolf J. Flywheel
Margaret Dumont - Martha Phelps

“Consider, Watson, the irony, the tragic irony, that we accepted the commission from the victim to find her murderer. For the first time... we've been retained by a corpse.”

Basil Rathbone - Sherlock Holmes