“- Tej: Damn, Suki, uh... When you gonna pop my clutch, huh?
- Suki: As soon as you get the right set of tools.
- Tej: Yeah, a'ight.”
Ludacris - Tej
Devon Aoki - Suki

“- Roy: Just because you're familiar with the missionary position doesn't make you a missionary.
- Claudia: Look, Mr. Munster, you're not exactly the smartest guy I ever ran across.
- Roy: Oh yeah? And who are you, Alfred Einstein?”
Woody Harrelson - Roy Munson
Vanessa Angel - Claudia

“Iris? Oh yeah, she's a big conquest. She's given more rides than Greyhound!”

Amanda Peterson - Cindy Mancini

“Hey Vince, buddy, I need a favor - I need you to fuck my daughter's friend so I don't have to.”
Bob Saget - Bob Saget

“Hey, Stoker, I'm talkin' to you... Or do you go by Stroker now, because I hear that's what your mom been doing... to your uncle. Have you been getting in on that?”

Lucas Till - Pitts