“These guys are a fucking disgrace!”

Allan F. Nicholls - Upton

“- Junior Healy: Dad, hockey is a dangerous sport.
- Ben Healy: No, it's not about hockey. It's about the way you treat other people.
- Junior Healy: I did nothing to Blade and those other guys that they wouldn't have done to me... except they couldn't have done it with as much style!”

Justin Chapman - Junior Healy
William Katt - Ben Healy

“- Todd: You're a terrible father. You let me eat cake and lollipops for breakfast every day.
- Donny: That's what you asked for!
- Todd: You are supposed to say no!”
Andy Samberg - Todd
Adam Sandler - Donny

“- Dudley Smith: For the love of God, don't be a detective. Stick to assignments where you don't have...
- Ed Exley: Dudley, I know you mean well, but I don't need to do it the way you did. Or my father.”

James Cromwell - Dudley Smith
Guy Pearce - Ed Exley

“- Larry Simpson: Theresa, your father... has he always had a one-track mind?
- Theresa Mazzetti: You know his bark is worse than his bite. He means well.
- Larry Simpson: I guess if I had a daughter as pretty as you are, I'd probably act the same way.”
Mark Harmon - Larry Simpson
Angela Cartwright - Theresa Mazzetti