“- Justine Last: Couple that prays together, stays together.
- Phil Last: I heard it was the couple that lays together, stays together.
- Justine Last: Well, you've heard wrong.”
Jennifer Aniston - Justine Last
John C. Reilly - Phil Last

“Listen to me, I got no reason to lie to you, don't make the same mistakes I made when I was young. Fuck a lotta women kid, not just one woman, a lotta women.”
Alan Arkin - Grandpa Edwin Hoover

“Are you two gonna have sex with each other? 'Cause me and Paige are.”

Robert Ri'chard - Blake

“- Lucille: Alky can't make a fool of me. I want to go places. I want to do things. I want freedom, I want liberty, I want justice...
- Groucho: Madam, you're making history. In fact, you're making me, and I wish you'd keep my hands to yourself.”
Thelma Todd - Lucille
Groucho Marx - Groucho

“I don't go to bed with just anyone anymore. I have to be attracted to them sexually.”
Mira Sorvino - Marta Ferrer