“- Guildenstern: I think I have it. A man talking sense to himself is no madder than a man talking nonsense not to himself.
- Rosencrantz: Or just as mad.”
Tim Roth - Guildenstern
Gary Leonard Oldman - Rosencrantz

“- Claudia Draper: Now, you talk to me and pretend I'm sane, okay?
- Aaron Levinsky: Okay.
- Claudia Draper: And I'll do the same for you.”
Barbra Streisand - Claudia Draper
Richard Stephen Dreyfuss - Aaron Levinsky

“Good morning, Gil. I said, good morning, Gil.”

Bill Murray - Bob Wiley

“And that's my story. That's my entire story. I wanted you to know so you would understand why I can't see you anymore. So, I guess this is good-bye. What are you saying? You want a good-bye what? No I can't. I can't. I'm seeing Slater now. Oh you're so bad. Okay just one for the road.”

Molly Shannon - Mary Katherine Gallagher

“- Dr. John Dolittle: How come I can hear you talking?
- Lucky: I dunno. Maybe you're just weird or something.”
Eddie Murphy - Dr. John Dolittle
Norm MacDonald - Lucky