“I feel like I'm caught in a Trojan! A pleated Trojan! With fringe!”

Shelley Lee Long - Lucy Chadman

“- Mrs. Aaron: That shirt makes you look fat.
- James Aaron: That's because I am fat.
- Mrs. Aaron: You're not fat!
- James Aaron: If anything, I make the shirt look fat!”
Mina Kolb - Mrs. Aaron
Jeff Garlin - James Aaron

“- Walter Fielding: Has this ever happened to you before?
- Jack Schnittman: Yes.
- Paramedic: Seven times in the past five months.
- Walter Fielding: I thought the jogging was getting you in better shape.
- Jack Schnittman: It is.
- Paramedic: Yeah thanks to the jogging I can lift him into the ambulance.”

Tom Hanks - Walter Fielding
Josh Mostel - Jack Schnittman
Wendell Pierce - Paramedic

“Keep cooking like that and I won't even be able to move, let alone do science.”

Larry Blamire - Dr. Paul Armstrong

“- Lara: You really think I'm skinny? Bulimic skinny or anorexic skinny?
- Lauren Hynde: What's the difference?
- Lara: Bulimic skinny passes for healthy, except your teeth rot. But my teeth aren't rotting, so...”
Shannyn Sossamon - Lauren Hynde
Jessica Biel - Lara