“- Mr. Jones: I look better than you!
- Uncle Elroy: You don't!
- Mr. Jones: I cook better than you!
- Uncle Elroy: You can't!
- Mr. Jones: My dick is bigger than yours!
- Uncle Elroy: It was cold that night! ”
John Witherspoon - Mr. Jones
Don 'D.C.' Curry - Uncle Elroy

“It's nice to meet a grown man who's still afraid of his mommy.”
Ricki Lake - Connie Doyle

“Say something! Do something! Be a man! I already have a butler!”

Glenn Close - Sunny von Bülow

“There are three things a man must do alone: be born, die and, well, we all know the other one.”

John Leguizamo - Cholo

“Real men don't play bridge.”

Russell Crowe - Max Skinner