“- Danny Campbell: Hey, if you guys are going to have sex in the pool, can you at least do it over by the filters...
- Frank Gomes: Sinners!”
Graham Phillips - Danny Campbell
Zack Pearlman - Frank Gomes

“It still strikes me as strange that anyone could have any moral objection to someone else's sexuality. It's like telling someone else how to clean their house.”
River Phoenix

“Minimumwage for a maximum loser!”
Alexandra Holden - Lulu

- Billy: She's the only girl that makes my heart beat faster and slower at the same time. When I'm not with her... I'm not living. I'm only existing until I can hold her in my arms again.
- Jessica: [sighs]
- Jake: "Gay, gay, gay, gay."
Matthew Lawrence - Billy
Rob Schneider - Jessica
Eric Christian Olsen - Jake

“I gotta go to the John, I'll be right back. Gonna introduce Mr. Thick Dick to Mr. Urinal Cake!”
Dan Aykroyd - Roman Craig