“- Irwin 'Fletch' Fletcher: John Cock... tos... ton.
- Gail Stanwyk: That's a beautiful name.
- Irwin 'Fletch' Fletcher: Well, it's Scotch/Romanian.
- Gail Stanwyk: That's an odd combination.
- Irwin 'Fletch' Fletcher: Yeah, well, so were my parents.”
Chevy Chase - Irwin 'Fletch' Fletcher
Dana Wheeler-Nicholson - Gail Stanwyk

“Gatsby's real name was James Gatz. His parents were dirt-poor farmers from North Dakota, but he never accepted them as his parents at all. In his own imagination, he was a son of God, destined for future glory.”
Tobey Maguire - Nick Carraway

“- Jack Colt: Give me a name!
- Tim Becker: Weren't your parents supposed to do that?”
Emilio Estevez - Jack Colt
Jon Lovitz - Tim Becker

“What was always told about Little Margaret was the funny story of how she got her name. Her family's got 12 kids and I guess at the hospital, her Dad forgot they already had a Margaret, and called her Margaret too.”
Ryan Rajendra Black - Silas Crow

“- Junior: Orphan Tulip?
- Tulip: Tulip is just fine, Orphan hurts my heart!”
Andy Samberg - Junior
Katie Crown - Tulip